How I Developed Fear of Public Speaking by Maria Gurevich.
I was never the prettiest, the smartest, nor the best behaved.
But my ability to write well and speak well in public has opened doors and taken me places since my kindergarten days back in Soviet Russia.
For the winter holiday concert, to the envy of all other girls, the kindergarten teachers PICKED ME to be Father Frost’s (Russian Santa Claus’s) granddaughter, a snow maiden larger than a Disney princess in Russian folklore.
I was to be on stage the entire night with THE REAL Santa Claus. My costume was a sparkly dress with fur trimmings and an exquisite crown. It was aglow in pearly blue with crystals around the edges, a delicate 3D snowflake in the middle, and it glistened like fresh snow under the stars. An outfit that makes little girls contemplate murder for the first time.
My script was 5 pages in small print. I also had to memorise Santa’s script, so I knew my cues. I would MC the entire show, recite poetry, announce performers, distribute Santa’s gifts; each action accompanied by a poem. The best thing that ever happened to me made all the other girls cry.
I heard them say, “She is not pretty, she never gets good behavior points, she doesn’t deserve it.” I heard mothers say, “With that nose she should play a witch. How appalling to pick an outsider for this role. We should demand an explanation.” And they did.
One morning one mother informed the rest, “The administration explained their choice. Apparently the ugly duckling has a phenomenal memory, a loud voice and no stage fright.” They seemed satisfied. The notion implied that their daughters were shy and pretty, unlike me.
I got to keep the part and wear the crown. I breezed through all my lines and even helped Santa out when he forgot his. After the show, Santa shook hands with my parents and praised my performance. THE REAL Santa Claus confirmed that I was a good child.
My next public performance came eight years later and was the polar opposite of my first. I was fourteen, in a Canadian synagogue, addressing over a hundred worshipers with a speech I wrote myself in English. I moved the audience to tears. The Rabbi shook hands with my parents and praised my performance. The Sunday School principal offered me my first teaching job.
Since then, there were many performances, handshakes, job offers and teaching positions. But the public speaking and presentation workshops I offer my clients as part of Write Up’s programs is the most rewarding of all. Every time I speak in public or on camera, the ugly duckling is still inside, hearing whispers that she doesn’t deserve the crown. But my students do! They deserve the privileges and the confidence awarded by solid writing and presentation skills. A set of skills they can wear proudly like a crown.
Please don’t hesitate to contact me to find out more about these and other courses!