By Maria Gurevich.
It’s great that so many children including my clients are thriving on E-learning and even asking for more work. Not the case at my house. The first few weeks of trying to balance my work and homeschooling were chaotic. It has gotten better, and the following suggestions are based on my experience as a mother, a teacher and an entrepreneur running my writing school now fully online. If you have given up, I can understand your frustration. But if you are still trying, maybe you will find my tips helpful.
Do plan your day ahead of time with some flexibility. Most teachers post the weekly workload on Mondays, so you can plan ahead. Decide together how much time is reasonable to spend on homework every day. Remind your child that during regular school they spend about 5 hours on average following a strict school schedule and then come home with homework. Play up the fact that now they have a say in their schedule. Negotiate the number of hours, write it down and stick to it. We each make a to-do list for the next day on a cue card before going to bed, and put it under our pillows. We make sure it also includes things we enjoy. This way we always go to bed looking forward to the next day.
Don’t criticize teachers, the system and the assigned work, even if you think your kids are not listening. You can’t expect a child to want to learn something that you yourself deem to be useless, poorly organized, ineffective in delivery. Nothing about the current situation is perfect. It is what it is. The best thing we can do for our children is to show that life goes on and they still have the same responsibilities. But please, please understand, they are not going to take school seriously if you don’t take it seriously. Be very careful with what you say about teachers and and how you react to any communication from the school even if you think they are not listening.
Do limit the time they have to spend on work. Telling them that they can’t do anything fun until all the homework is done makes the homework seem like a neverending punishment. Setting a timer and requiring a child to focus only until the timer goes off takes a lot of the stress out. Break up the workload into smaller tasks. Challenge your child to estimate how long each task is going to take. Offer your estimate and make it slightly longer than their estimate. The child will want to finish faster to prove that their estimate was correct. Set a timer and take a break when the time runs out. If you have a very reluctant learner, I find it helps me motivate my kids and even myself sometimes when I set the timer, for example for 20 minutes and say: “20 minutes is all that stands between you and a more accomplished, successful you.” This helps me with anything I don’t like doing.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Be a parent, not a teacher. Your job is to guide and help your children establish a positive relationship with learning. Your job is to provide a place where they can focus, ask questions and get support.. Your job is to help them plan and manage their tasks to meet their goals. Finishing this year’s curriculum is not your job.
Do take the lead and take advantage of teachable moments. Quality time activities such as cooking, watching educational videos, and taking walks offer endless opportunities for learning; and these can easily be matched with curriculum topics. Boiling and freezing points and evaporation can be learned while cooking. Take a drive or a bike ride to learn about friction, momentum and inertia. Habitat of an alligator from the handout your teacher posted online can easily be replaced with the habitat of a squirrel observed on your daily nature walk. The curriculum isn’t everything. You have a lot of knowledge and skills to teach your child. From recipes to stories of life before the internet to skin care, dating advice and the trade secrets of your profession, you have a lot to teach your child and this is the time to do it.
Don’t compromise your relationship with your child. Don’t make them feel bad for not doing the work. Missing out on learning about the first Canadian in space won’t hurt your child in the long run. Memories of being stuck at home arguing with mom or dad over homework will do a lot more harm.
Do allow self directed learning. Look at the assignment you have received and decide what skills are being taught. If your child refuses to do the assignment, chances are it can be modified with teacher’s approval. Does writing a paragraph on the war of 1812 cause a battle in your house? Ask which historical event your child would like to research instead? Research and paragraph writing skills will be developed regardless of which event you pick. If you want to replace the topic and feel that your child will still learn from the modified activity, email the teacher and let them know that you will be modifying. Most of the time it will be fine. Your teacher may even have helpful suggestions.